Wow! it's been quite a bit longer than i anticipated since I wrote last.
Our December was somewhat eventful with the news that we would be adding a new little one to our family in July! We are so excited... Steve I think the most! It was a surprise... a BIG surprise to us.
I have PCOS (poly cystic ovarian syndrome) which causes infertility and other wonderful side effects, so we were starting to think that taking fertility treatments would be the way we would have another member in our family.... we were wrong. It's been almost five years since I have been pregnant and I have to say that I don't remember a lot of things! Thankfully my next door neighbor is a wonderful patient woman who just happens to work as a nurse in an OB office! She has been wonderful answering my, I'm sure, nervous nellie questions. I didn't remember all the nausea and tiredness. WOW!
I am, however, very blessed with a fabulous husband who has had sympathy for me and been at my beckon call when he's been home. I just love that man!
We had a good Christmas, a little somber, but good. Sometimes it is surprising the way things prick your heart and also the way the Lord calms us all. Michael seemed very aware this holiday season that Josh was missing... more than I thought he would. He kept asking what toys Santa was taking to Josh in heaven and if Josh would get to come down for Christmas. I wish that was the way it worked, that they could just come visit when we needed them; but then we wouldn't need faith and patience. Michael enjoyed the weeks up to Christmas with all that was going on at school and the few flakes we got. He was so excited about everything! There was one friday morning he came in to wake me up and announced that it was Christmas morning! I asked him if there were presents in our stockings, a little perplexed he looked and then was a little disappointed :( On Christmas morning we took our time... 8:30 wahoo! Mike was so stoked though that he bypassed his present from santa to make sure the milk was gone! After we were done opening presents and playing for a bit, we took a few balloons and filled them with our love to send up to heaven for Josh. Mike loves doing this and it's been a pretty nice release for Steve and I too. It's strange and a little unnerving sometimes when you can't do anything for your child that you still love. I have to say that is the part I hate the most!!!
Anyway, we also sent more love up to heaven that afternoon after a wonderful Christmas lunch with the Woolstenhulme side. It was neat to see the sky filled with blue, white, and gold and in my little heart feeling like someone understands. Mike enjoyed his Christmas thoroughly and still thinks it's going to be Christmas on the few days we've gotten snow... too bad for him it doesn't work that way.
Happy New Year to all